10 Ways to Deal with the Aftermath of Bipolar Anger

Dealing with anger as it arises with mania or agitated depression can be a thorny problem. We are, at times, angry and caught up in the frustration of the moment. I remember a time in the midst of bipolar excess, throwing a plate of spaghetti at my father. Fortunately, I missed. I was agitated, and the amplification of mood during a manic episode led to my acting out my anger. Eventually, recovering from the episode, I was remorseful and wanted to make amends.

So, how do you mend fences after the anger passes, perhaps triggered by grandiosity and alienating someone else, perhaps a loved one or a friend? Here are some ways to set things right after you have caused others to put you at a distance.

10 Ways to Deal with the Aftermath of Bipolar Anger

1. Ask the person involved how they feel. Be a listener more than a speaker. When they are finished, acknowledge their feelings. Ask what you can do to make things right?
   
2. When appropriate, admit wrongdoing and take responsibility for the misunderstanding.


3. Explain your position, but do not make excuses. Tell how things seemed from you point of view.


4. Attempt to reconstruct an attitude of goodwill.


5. Seek out help to rectify a wrong. If you cannot do this yourself, a therapist or clergy might be helpful. Sometimes, a good friend can help to mediate a misunderstanding.


6. Be curious, not furious. Instead of engaging in anger as a response
   to an altercation, be thoughtful and question how the other party
   sees the situation.


7. Be tenacious in seeking out a remedy.


8. Forgiveness can only be given by the person wronged. Do not expect it will always be given.


9. Above all, say you are sorry and be sincere.


10. After making amends, forgive yourself.